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Have a word with yourself mate


This article far from being about chavvy provocative language is actually around finding and maintaining motivation, more specifically a technique I have used successfully over the last 16 years to do just that.

It is also not specifically just for martial artists but everyone In general.

Whether its maintaining doing something positive such as a hobby, keeping fit, or going to the gym. Or not doing things that have a negative impact on us I hope that this article will have equal value.

Back in my earlier kickboxing days where we were regularly training 4 nights a week there were naturally people that came and went in the school. Often you would train alongside people daily for 2-3 yrs for them to go on holiday to Zante for a fortnight and never come back training.

Over the coming years there have been many a time when, whether out in a pub or a club or just in the street I would come across some of these people.

There would be the usual greetings of, “hello mate! how’s it going not seen you for ages what you been up to? Then the inevitable, “You still training.” To which I would reply that yes I was and maybe now had my black belt and was running my own school or similar. The usual response was one of “Yeah I keep meaning to get back, I really miss it just work got a bit crazy then had the little one etc etc”

I always felt very strongly afterwards that I never wanted to be on the other end of that conversation, I never wanted to be the one wondering what it would feel like having kept going.

So a good exercise I have done regularly over the years is take a bit of time out and imagine the following scenario, it’s not actually that hard to do and has some quite profound effects.

Imagine you are out in a pub and you see yourself 5 yrs from now, give yourself the same old greeting of “Hello mate how’s it going blah blah blah and then ask the question “Are you still training?” (Or whatever your thing maybe could be painting or singing whatever)

Then imagine the two responses, the first one is a yes.

Firstly Think of the way your going to look, how you are going to feel. If you are a martial artist think of how you could recount the places you have been and the people you have met along the way. The cool stuff you have done and where it is going to take you. You may have even beaten the system and be earning a living doing what you love.

Now imagine the conversation when it is a no.

The likelihood is you will equally be able to visualise how that conversation will go. That you wished you had kept it going but what with work and the kids and that you just haven’t got the time. Your looking to start back soon when everything settle down etc……

Now remember that it is still the same person, it is still you, you would equally be able to justify both responses in your own mind, You always can and that’s the danger. The one that said yes still had kids, a wife, a crazy job, they always do.

It is not our circumstances that dictate the outcome rather the way we choose to apply ourselves within them. It’s very easy, too easy to become the no person, but wouldn’t it be much better to be able to smile and answer yes.

Because who knows how the conversation might go from there ; )

There is a great self development tool where you can find all the answers you’ll ever need, it’s surprisingly cheap and much easier to get hold of than you think.

A mirror….. ; )

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